Round-the-way girl and rapper Eve (pictured), finally tied the knot on Saturday with longtime beau,Gumball 3000 car race founder Maximillion Cooper (pictured), according to E! News. The pair and th…
Source: newsone.com
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Mixed American Life 
Reblogged this on Green Grass and Tea Leaves and commented:
I know I am late posting this, but I couldn’t be more happy for Eve. I absolutely love to see black women making quality choices in life and love, and having seen so many women in my family marry down, the value of finding a quality partner can’t be overstated.
Some of you may know, due to my blogging in support of No Wedding, No Womb, that I had a baby out of wedlock as a teenager and grew up in a single parent home, and though my son was able to escape much of the reality I witnessed through adoption, the memories still linger for me of the circumstances surrounding his birth and the nightmare of those early years.
Too often, I see white American men and women being able to take advantage of existing within a marriage and family-centered culture. Yet, the emphasis in the black community both in the media and in many social environments seems to be focused on highlighting out of wedlock births, low marriage rates, struggle and dead beat or negligent parenting. Luckily, one can tune out the low class, dead end cultural values and shift their focus to the positive messages and circumstances that affirm life.
I wish there was more emphasis on healthy marital unions and parenting efforts on the part of both blacks in same race relationships and in interracial partnerships. I was fortunate the reality I witnessed growing up wasn’t strong enough to prevent me from choosing better for my son.
Black women don’t have to marry low quality men, even if that is the prevailing demographic that they’ve been socialized to interact with. Eve is a wonderful example of the great possibilities out there for women who know their worth and are willing to expand their horizons. Other examples include Tina Turner and Tamar Braxton, who are both are black women who didn’t accept diminished outcomes for themselves.
Recently, I read Condoleeza Rice’s memoir, and I really enjoyed learning more about her life. The only detail that disappointed me about her experience was that she mentioned her preference to perhaps remain single if she didn’t fulfill her expectation to marry a black man. It made me sad, because I think if a woman wants to be married, she should not limit herself to being single on the account of race. Though there may be few black American men who have achieved a degree of success on par with her accomplishments, there are many of powerful and/or accomplished men in the global village who could potentially be a quality partner for her. Perhaps one of them, though not black, could have provided her with a loving partnership that, as she implored Piers Morgan in 2011, is a “marriage of equals”.
Yet and still, I don’t profess to have a clue about the inner workings of her experience and choices in the relationship arena. She brushed over the topic in her book and didn’t expound on whether her career and other factors influenced her marital status.
So, now I’ll go back to minding my own business about that topic, but, the romantic in me still wants to see her get hitched. Lol!
Single ladies, I know that sometimes life points to the fact that you can’t escape the diminished outcomes that are too often promoted for black women in the mass media (LHHATL, etc), but my hope is that you will not allow your fears, familiarity or old patterns to cause you accept a diminished reality for yourself. Partner with trash and you will immediately accept diminished outcomes that are included with the package (constant cheating, abandonment, single parenting, overwork, usury, verbal/physical abuse, and/or etc), and I and you both know you deserve more. You deserve a good life, so reach for it.
Wishing Eve and her husband a quality marriage filled with lots of blissful moments and longevity!!
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